I have really had a rough time this month. I’d been having weird dreams and an eerie sense of foreboding before all of the news of Japan’s earthquake, tsunami and ongoing crisis broke. After watching some of the news stories I sunk into one of the blackest places I’ve been in recent memory. Though I have spent years cultivating and developing my intuitive abilities and learning to step out of being energetically bombarded with everything that was going on in the world around me, this time nothing I did helped. I holed up, didn’t go anywhere or do anything I didn’t absolutely have to do and let the emotions roll on through. Sometimes there is nothing else to do.
After a few days I finally picked up my hoop. I let go and let the hoop take me where it would. I started slowly, hooping through the silence with the hoop circling my waist and hands in prayer position at my heart. The invitation in the rhythm grew louder and stronger than the chaos in my mind. One revolution at a time the balance shifted. One beat at a time my body started to relax. I turned on my iPod and one song after another called my name and drew me swiftly back to center. Warm waves of appreciation swept through me reminding me that everyone I know is safe, everyone I know is well, regardless of what is happening in the world, life goes on. After a while I felt my spirit take flight. I could see that the most positive and productive thing I could do was to take care of myself so that I am able to respond to what life asking of me. If I can find my way out of the dark then perhaps it will remind others that they can emerge and find their center, as well.
The truth is that it took more than just hooping to make the shift from energetically compromised to lovingly compassionate, from hopeless to hopeful. I had some long talks with Rob about what I was feeling, I hung out with my kitty, I called a few close friends and poured out my heart, I watched videos that reminded me of some things I’d forgotten and I slept. A lot. As I finally started breaking through the bleakness stepping into the hoop day by day helped me get grounded and come back to center over and over until I felt somewhat normal again. Hooping has had a profound healing effect on my life, in countless ways. And for this I am very grateful.